The Baby is Coming

​It’s been a month since we told the Interwebs we decided to become foster parents. Upon publication of the aforementioned blog post, we had just completed the final step in our certification process. We were overly excited/anxious/terrified for what lied ahead. We placed our phones on ring and woke up every day anticipating “the call” because we know…
 
The baby is coming.
 
Just two weeks after our final home inspection the phone rang. Our hearts began to race as we answered the call, unsure of the story on the other line. But alas, the phone call was nothing more than an administrative follow-up to our home study. I felt betrayed by that ringtone. I had no emotional space for “fake out calls”, but we remained hopeful because…
 
The baby is coming.
 
And then this week, the phone rang again. Still slightly wounded from the deceptive call the previous week, I nervously listened to the voice on the other line. But this time was different. The voice held the story of a one-year-old little boy who needed a new home. A bright, developmentally normal little fella’ whose biological parents and current foster parents were having trouble “playing by the rules”.
 
”How perfect”, I thought. I live, breathe, and {unfortunately} shower in all things “boy”.  After a short consultation with the hubs, I confirmed our enthusiasm to welcome this little guy into our home. I spoke his name. I told my family. I told my friends. I told my sons. My heart began to overflow for this little one I had never met. I scrubbed all the bathrooms and miraculously put away the laundry because…
 
The baby is coming.
 
For the next 48 hours, we anxiously awaited the call from the social worker with the final ETA. But instead, after 48 hours, the social worker called to inform me that this little boy was no longer in need of a home and was able to stay in his current location. I was crushed. I had never met this child, but he already held a piece of my heart. It’s a funny thing when you decide to love other people’s children as your own – you grieve as if they’re your own. He will never know my name, but I have showered him in prayer since the moment I heard his. I cried real, heavy tears knowing that I wouldn’t get to love on this child. But then, I reminded myself that the only thing better than a beautiful foster placement is to never have a need for foster care. This little fella was meant to stay with his family, but I had to wonder…
 
Is the baby coming?
 
As I stood in my kitchen trying to bear the news gracefully (which as you can imagine, I did not) I caught a glimpse of my son’s advent calendar. Every day he wakes up with great anticipation to read the verse and see the image hidden behind each cardboard door. This discipline of waiting is the true meaning of Advent. A time of restraint and reflection and recognition that we still live in a hurting and broken world. A world that still has a need for foster families. A world that bears mass shootings and acts of terror with alarming frequency. A world filled with broken hearts and strained relationships. A world that is in desperate need of a Savior.

But in this season of waiting we find that the reasons we grieve are the same reasons we are able to find hope. Hope in knowing there is at least one foster family whose services have gone unneeded for a month. Hope in knowing a little boy can stay safely with his family. Hope in watching people of varying faiths rally around a college classmate who was hatefully profiled. Hope in watching neighbors shower new moms and sick friends with meals when they need it most.  And as a Christian, I am hopeful because…
 
The Baby is coming.
 
A Baby who restores the irreparable and redeems the unforgivable. A Baby who brings hope to the hopeless and cares fervently for the oppressed. A Baby that would be placed on a cross to die for every last one of my sins so that I could live forever with Him. And this little Baby is coming again, and for that, we hopefully wait. And so while my heart eagerly yearns to welcome a child into our home, it is with a joyful and hopeful heart that I can continue to wait because…
 
The Baby is coming!